Ignore?
Sulk?
Threat?
Smile?
Ignore?
Investigate?
Compete?

If you understand everything, you'll forgive everything.....

How do you know that you really love someone?

How do you know that you really love someone? Really know...

For me personally, I thought I knew that and had known that for years but I found out that I only really-really knew that when I saw the near-lifeless body of my sweetheart. Then it really hit me...like a...well not a bomb or a speeding train...what hit me was more like a vacuum...nothingness...emptiness...whatever it was.

Suddenly I realised that deep inside my heart I really love this person in front of me. I realised that I would do anything for the person and only wished that the near-lifeless body will heal, will recuperate and be up and running again. I missed everything. I missed the smile, I missed the laughter. I also missed the smirk and nagging...even though they used to be (and still are) painful to, at times. I missed our chat, either serious or empty. I missed us being together....

That's when I realised that I love this person in front of me. That's when I promised, infront of the unconscious body, that if my sweetheart gets well, I will love her no matter what.....and it's a promise that I will not (and cannot) break, insya-Allah, for it's not a promise to my sweetheart but a promise to myself....I am accountable to my self and that means a lot to me.

That's when I prayed that my sweetheart will be well again....that's when I prayed that my sweetheart will smile again. Not the half-face smile...but full, cheerful smile. That's when I prayed that our love will survive whatever that's thrown to us. That's when I knew that I really love someone....

Now, my prayers have been answered. Sometimes, in the heat of things I forget... sometimes, with the demand of day to day life, I forget... But I guess I am lucky in a way. At night, when my sweetheart is soundly asleep...when my sweetheart is resting...when my sweetheart looks like not being conscious...I am reminded...still do...and everytime I am reminded...I am so happy...I know that I love this person.... not matter what....

I am being blackmailed

I am being blackmailed!!!!

Unbelievable....

As a friend said, there's always the first for everything...

7 wonders of the world

7 wonders of the world.

What are they? You can find all sorts of list out there.

Today I was alerted to another list;

Ability to;
1. See
2. Hear
3. Taste
4. Touch
5. Smell
6. Laugh
7. Love

Isn't it beautiful....with all those lists out there, if this list is not available, will they be THE Wonders? or you'll be wondering...

Life Goes On...

I am in a position where an idiot is trying to start an argument (maybe have started from his perspective)...this has been happening for the past few months and it is getting worse. I need to remind myself of the quote below.

This is getting out of control as this person is not sincere in resolving the matter, instead he has a totally different agenda but does not want to admit so. I guess it is also cultural thing as this person is a foreigner.

I hate it....

Don't argue with an idiot! He'll bring you down to his level and beat you by experience....

I was talking abt trust....100% trust....freedom and trust....

Check out this story I saw today....

A little girl and her father were crossing a bridge. The father was worried so he told his little daughter, "Sweetheart, please hold my hand so that you don't fall into the river."

The little girl said, "No, Dad. You hold my hand."

"What's the difference?" asked the puzzled father.

"There's a big difference," replied the little girl. "If I hold your hand and something happens to me, chances are that I may let your hand go. But if you hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will never let my hand go."

In any relationship, the essence of trust is not in its bind, but in its bond. So hold the hand of the person whom you love rather than expecting them to hold yours...

Desperate people do desperate things....

I am in front of the TV accompanying my sweetheart watching a movie, "You've Got Mail." In one of the scene, a few people are trapped in an elevator and while waiting for help, one of them suggested that they all (abt 4-5 of them trapped in there) jumped. "Why jump?" asked one. "If we all jump, the elevator thinks there's no one in it, so it will open," explained the guy who suggested...guess what they did.... jumped....

I know...I know...it's just a movie and the script-writer and the director must have thought it's cute...but how about this...buying blackened papers believing they can be 'washed' using special chemical into bona-fide US dollar notes...writing numbers on leaves of a tree believing the numbers will be lucky and win the writer lottery...sending your daughter to be treated of bad-lucks by a man and she has to stay there for nights, alone with the man...huh....

I guess it's not just desperate but stupid....stupidity knows no boundary

I got this from my daughter last year....been sitting in my mailbox (and I've just realised that it's been close to a year). She wrote this exactly a month before her 8th birthday....

>>>>>

From: ***my daughter***
Sent: Monday, October 24, 2005 2:53 PM
To: ***me***
Subject: Thank you



Dear Abah,
thank you for sending me lots and lots of poems,
here's one for you:


Allah our Lord

Allah our Lord,
Lord of Mankind,
Allah our Lord,
Lord of our world,
Not just Lord of our world,
But Lord of the Universe.

Allah our Lord,
Nobody is Greater than him,
Allah our Lord,
We should Worship him.

Allah our Lord,
The Most Merciful The Most Kind,
Allah our Lord,
He's the only ONE God.

By ***her full name***

I hope you like it!


From
***my daughter***

I got this from a friend....together with a lot of other photos, but this is special...

It's Ramadhan, the Blessed Month. In fact, it's mid-way through. This year, it's been very special to me as I've been home throughout it...so far. Last year's was spent traveling around. Still remember breaking fast at Usman in Bangkok. And that was a luxury. compared to having toast at a hotel for it at other times. So happy this time around.

Not to mention the numerous times I ended up doing terawih prayers at KLIA... breaking fast on a flight... on a cab.... queueing up in the long lines for immigration...

100% Trust

Is there such thing as 100% trust? Is it healthy? How do you manage it?

How important is trust to you?

Trust has been one of the key values in my life. It's been there since I can remmber. I was given a lot of freedom but the freedom has always been accompanied by trust. Still remember that at 13 I was allowed to roam freely with friends. Generally, no question asked. I could come home at 10pm and leave again at 11pm - though I usually get back home by midnight... Weekends used to be totally free where I used to spend time exploring the areas around our neighbourhood, swam in the lake, climbed hills which felt like mountain then. But I know that I was fully trusted by my parents and it was the key thing that stopped me from doing wrong things - smoking etc.... I remember being at a friend's place with about 10 of my friends and I was the only one not smoking. Even those who had very strict rules at home did. I just couldn't.

I used to think that trust is respected by all but slowly I realised that it is not the case. The bad thing is, once you've started, it generally got difficult to stop.

My daughter is now 8. Since a couple of months back she has been having some problems at school. It started with her note books being torn to shreds. Then one of her books had all the pages glued together...terrible things to happen to a child. I guessed it must have been some naughty boys in school. I mean, these are disruptive but 'fun' things to do in the mind of some twisted minded kids. Later she had sand being put on her desk. Bad....but i decided to let the school handle these.

However, last week something else happened. After a hiatus of nearly a month. She had 'F**k You' written on one of the note book. I found out when she asked me that night, "Dad, what does 'F**k' mean?" I was shocked and after some chat, found out what happened. The next day, I was at the school and met the headmistress and she's aware of all except for the last incident...told her everything....and I demanded that I get to meet the student and his/her parents (in my mind, this was too much and the boy/s need serious lesson). On the way back from the school I started to think what will I be doing if I were to meet them thus the previous posting. I really wanted to say that, "If you ever repeat it, I'll break your arm!" even in front of the parent. I guess I am a bit of the old-school as far as child disciplining is concerned.

Anyhow, that was last week. Yesterday I went to the school and met the headmistress again. She explained to me that they had tried to call me (that explained a couple of miss calls I had on Friday). The discipline teacher had managed to find the culprit according to the headmistress. And what shocked me was when she explained that the culprit had confessed. "She confessed, after some questionings from the discipline teacher and the evidence, including her own handwriting, shown to her." I nearly feel of the chair....she??? a girl did all those things.....arghhhhh.....what has happened????

What about my plan then.....huh...

Last week I was planning to tell an 8-year old boy that I'll break his arm...crazy was I? Don't know, but I was seriously thinking about it.

I read this a while back....act of kindness?

You know, he almost didn't see the old lady, stranded on the side of the road. But even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was worried.

No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe, he looked poor and hungry. He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you. He said, "I'm here to help you ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan."

Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.

As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid. Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk.

She asked him how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She had already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped.

Bryan never thought twice about the money. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty who had given him a hand in the past...He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.

He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance that they needed, and Bryan added " ..and think of me".

He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight.

A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The cash register was like the telephone of an out of work actor-it didn't ring much.

Her waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase.

The lady noticed that the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan.

After the lady finished her meal, and the waitress went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, the lady slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. She wondered where the lady could be, then she noticed something written on the napkin under which was 4 $100 bills. There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote.

It said: "You don't owe me anything, I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you."

Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written.

How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard. She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, "Everything's gonna be all right; I love you, Bryan."

act of kindness...especially random is very special